I had my first real accident on the bike on Thursday. It was going to happen sooner or later, the way I cycle. Reckless. Luckily, injuries were minor, if they can be called injuries at all. Anyway, this is how it happened:

I was turning into a cycling lane, cutting across a road. Suddenly, a car appeared from the left. So I turned left to look at it. Oh look, a car! Then I looked in front of me. Oh fuck, a fence! It was too late to turn by then so, CRASH! And the left side of my face was whacked against the fence and I fell off the bike. A random guy walked by and pretended he hadn't seen a thing. Surprisingly, I was still in one piece. Of course, I felt like I had been boxed in the ear. A few dots of blood from broken skin and a dazed feeling. And I also have a humongous bruise on my right thigh.

I got up, checked the bike for damage and continued on my way to King's Manor to give a seminar presentation. And nobody here need ever find out about my stupid accident.

Yesterday, I went for a full day first aid course. I am now a qualified first aider (British Red Cross). So if any is bleeding or dying, I'll practise the 3 Ps. Panic, Piss Off and Pretend nothing happened. Just kidding! I'll be happy to give you CPR anytime. You just have to ask.

Christmas is constantly on my mind now. Soon, I'll be changing the song to one of those christmas songs that irritate the hell out of everyone in shopping centres.